They might even be relieved or pleased to see you doing right by you.All that you having boundaries does is ensure that you’re in your own space and that actually, you’re not crossing theirs either.
Porn chats without credit card - Asserting myself while dating
Don’t chase instant results – make an investment in you and your present and future happiness. Whether it’s figuring out what’s going on in a troubling relationship, understanding you and self-care, or being more assertive, I’m here to help you guide you.
Another Valentine’s Day has come and gone, and I’m left thinking about Cupid’s arrow and L-O-V-E. A movie I couldn’t talk anyone else into seeing with me.
I’ve got to give it attention, this real-life romance with myself, as if it’s a brand new relationship. Maybe even get your nails done, and a fresh new haircut.
You’d also probably do your dishes and clean your toilet. And when they follow-up to see how your new relationship is going? Use your friends and support system to hold you accountable.
I’m not suggesting that they’re going to pat you on the back and skip off each time you say or show no, but then it’s not as if you’re going to be doing this each time somebody says no to you, hence that’s not going to stop you from having healthy boundaries (hopefully) as your desire to live your life authentically and happily shouldn’t be dictated about the amount of applause you get for doing what you need to be doing anyway.
You having boundaries won’t greatly affect a person with healthy boundaries, if at all, because they weren’t out of bounds in the first place. For me, it looks like putting my best foot forward, as if each day is a first date with myself. I don’t know about you, but washing my hair is a must for a first date. I psych myself up, I talk kindly about myself, and I don’t talk about my past relationships (or gas). Get ready: shower, shave, put on your feel-good make-up and do your hair in a fun, flirty, very you way. You having boundaries is going to feel bad to you if you have an unrealistic expectation that your boundaries will force people to change their ways and if you keep looking for them to make you feel better about the fact that they crossed your line, when that’s like going into the lion’s cage and expecting it not to bite you and then going back to reason with it and asking it to behave like a dog.In reality, you only have to ‘step up’ for people who like to tap dance all over your boundaries, so unless every last person in your life is shady, you can chill out and enjoy being you with people who are in your Circle of Trust.If somebody takes issue with you owning your right to have a line and a limit, it’s not because you’re not ‘doing’ it right and if you tweak your boundaries enough, they’ll sign off on them; it’s because that’s a code red alert that they see boundaries as a problem and that’s about issues, not you.