Initially we had web cams, I got rid of mine, he still had his and just put it away a couple months ago (5).
I had always wondered why he kept it set up right next to his computer when we didn’t use it anymore with each other.
I told him I felt bad that he was looking at the pictures; obviously I’m not what he was looking at.
The beginning emails- I felt we were just starting to date, so it wasn’t as big of a deal, then I saw emails in the middle of our relationship and some current ones.
About a month ago a girl sent him something entitled from your Canadian girls, saying how they hadn’t talked for awhile, he told her he’d been really busy with stuff, said he’d explain later and hoped to see her soon...
Typically, what happens when you try to control a partner’s behavior, especially a behavior that is very rewarding to him, a partner will learn to better hide or conceal his activities (see when people lie).
And it may help to be realistic about how much both you and your boyfriend can change with respect to this issue.
Eventually, he went and deleted all the pornography and included the pictures of that girl. I finally broke down, I knew his email password, and I know it’s wrong, but it didn’t stop me, I just needed to know if he was talking to anyone-more than just friends.
He said it was to put an end to everything and I should never doubt his love for me. Well, I continued to use his computer and I would check every once in awhile just to see if I’d find any new pics of any girls. I was searching for a site I had gone to before so I pulled down the bar where you can see past sites visited and ratemybody.com, adultfriendfinder and others were listed. I understand what these sites are and at first I just thought he was going to them just to look at the women. So I found emails from adultfriendfinder telling him he’s got new matches or so and so was contacting him.
I just don’t know how to handle this whole thing, I love him dearly and it hurts very badly...
He’s got so many good qualities and in my heart I feel as though he truly loves me, would never hurt me, but-I know I’ve babbled, I just wanted to make sure everything was clear. On one hand, your boyfriend has been turning to other women for sexual gratification—leaving you feeling hurt, betrayed and rejected.
And from your boyfriend’s perspective, on-line porn/chatting/sex can be very difficult to stop.